Beat the Mid-winter Blahs with a Bowl of Steaming Borscht

I LOVE soup. Hot or cold (but usually hot), creamy or broth-y, as a starter or an entree - I love soup of all types.

Last weekend I exercised my soup-making talents by cooking up a large pot of borscht. This Russian staple isn't quite as popular here as it is back in the old country, probably because beets have unfairly taken a hard rap. How can that be? Beets are the about the sweetest vegetable there is and as a base for borscht, it is accompanied by cubed beef (and marrow bones), carrots, shredded cabbage, onions and more. When completed, borscht is thick and dense like a stew, and topped off with a generous dollop of sour cream and sprinkling of fresh dill. Add a thick slab of pumpernickel bread with butter you have a hearty meal that will stand up to any manly (or womanly) appetite.

I had made borscht only one time before in my life and liked it a lot, but beets aren't universally loved. I've discovered several "beet buddies" among my friends and if I crave them, I know a few people who might be willing to join me. As for cooking them at home - well, no one else likes them and having to listen to "ooh, yuck" can ruin a meal before you eat it. This weekend, though, the borscht was part of a birthday dinner promised to a friend who also happens to be among my beet buddies. When we discussed borscht, his eyes lit up and so (insert wicked laugh) it was beets for everybody.

And guess what? We really liked it. Even my husband liked it! The self-proclaimed beet hater likes borscht. Ha! Actually, the soup was really good and our local Whole Foods store baked me a fresh loaf of delicious pumpernickel bread to accompany it (thanks, guys!). I'll have to give this birthday dinner gift more often.

What Valentine's Day Really Means to Women

I recently watched a rerun of The Office titled "Valentine's Day." In it, the characters received - or didn't - traditional gifts of flowers and stuffed animals (one gal even received a key to her beau's house). Not every woman on staff received a delivery and by the end of the day, there were hurt feelings and long faces. (My favorite was the gal whose fiance, when challenged why he didn't send a gift, told her that the day wasn't over yet and she was going to get the best sex of her life that night. A note to men everywhere: Women don't think of sex as a gift.) The show was hilarious because it emphasized the major stereotypes of this "holiday made up by greeting card companies trying to sell more stuff and making guys feel like they have to buy something for their wife or girlfriend," as many men (my husband) proclaim.

I believe most men dislike, if not detest, Valentine's Day - not so much because of the greeting card company issue, but because they don't understand the emotional connection women have with the occasion. Furthermore, men are terribly befuddled when it comes to selecting the right gift. Is a simple gesture enough? After all, money is tight these days - is it really necessary to spend $150 or more on an elaborate floral arrangement? How hacked off will she get if you skip giving her a gift?

Fact of the matter is, men and women view Valentine's Day very differently. Women want an affirmation that they are adored; they really appreciate it when their special guy is willing to play by the unspoken Valentine's Day gift-giving rules (even though this same man may feel that the occasion is a bunch of crap). In general, women respond to the occasion emotionally - the day is all about feelings.

Men, however, view the Day in the same logical way they view the rest of their world. To have to get tangled up in all that emotional stuff... oy! What a hassle. Guys would rather ignore it and hope it all just goes away.

Finding a happy medium, where you both feel appreciated, can be tough, but it is possible. It helps if you remember each other's perspective and ensure that your expectations are realistic.

Here's hoping that you and your sweetie had a nice Valentine's Day, something that pleased you both and celebrated the things you love about each other.

A Frightful Sight at the Grammys

I'm beside myself!

Tonight, my husband, daughter and I watched the Grammy Awards, enjoying (or puzzling over) the live performances and asking endless questions of our daughter: Who is singing? Can you really understand the lyrics? What's the title of that song? You know - the usual "Clueless parents try to appreciate something that they're really just too old to watch" kinda thing.

I recognized Robert Plant (you go, guy, winning awards and all!) and Whitney Houston (she's looking MUCH better these days). I had a Lionel Richie flashback when I saw Kanye West's latest hair style. Ha! Things weren't totally unfamiliar.

But then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, here comes Stevie Wonder - I LOVE him! - and then he's joined by the Jonas Brothers. WHAT?! Are you kidding me? Arrgghhhhh!

"If I were in a grave, I'd be spinning!," was all I could manage to say. I wanted to cry. What is going on here? Is it the nearly full moon? Was it because Rihanna and Chris Brown didn't show? Why, why, why? Not even the Motown performances could lift my spirits.

Oh, Stevie, you're too fabulous to let this happen. Sure, those three boys were on the cover of Rolling Stone and have throngs of prepubescent fans. It's crazy fan-demonium for them, but it's not deep-rooted talent that will stand the test of time. Stevie, c'mon, you're just too amazing to be singing a Jonas Brothers song.

I need some rest. It's been a tough evening.

My Herb Garden

Ten years ago, newly divorced with two young children, I bought a nice house on a corner lot with a large yard. It was there that I discovered I could actually keep plants alive. The key for me was to grow the plants outside, not indoors in pots. (I had a 100% kill rate for indoor plants.)

I dug in the soil: Some plants came out, other plants went in, soil was amended with Black Kow. When I needed muscle, helpful neighbors pitched in. The whole place looked better.

My favorite plants were, and still are, herbs. Thanks to the robust soil with its cow manure, they grew lush and fragrant in two large beds outside my backdoor. I cooked with freshly harvested sage, rosemary, basil, tarragon and thyme - after a time, even my children knew which was what and could snip sprigs for me while I cooked. Because I planted herbs more for their appearance and scent than for my ability to cook with them (e.g., tarragon), I sought out new recipes that featured them (did you know tarragon is delicious with mushrooms or chicken? and the blooms on tarragon plants are edible?).

I also used my herbs around the house; in my bath (rosemary sprigs and lemon slices are refreshing, while lavender is soothing) or floral arrangements. They were so plentiful that I could share them with friends. I sold the house and moved three years ago, but still have memories of that wonderful herb garden and the joy it brought me.

I haven't had time for gardening at our new place, except for a large pot outside our front door that I change several times a year. A recent cold snap . killed a poinsettia that I planted in the pot two months ago, but the dusty miller I planted along with it survived. Earlier today I removed the dead plant and began pondering what to do now. Maybe some trailing plants (or an herb like thyme) in between the dusty miller and a tall herb in the center? Rosemary might not be exactly right. Not certain about lavender, either. Tarragon? Hmmm.

I'll noodle this over for a bit, but not too long. Herbs will start appearing in nurseries soon and the memory of my old herb garden inspires me to give it a go. Looks like Spring fever is catching me early this year.

Photos by Zsuzsanna Kilián; top - thyme; bottom - tarragon