Remembering a Wonderful Woman

Yesterday a couple hundred people in our community said farewell to a wonderful woman and I was among them. We honored Ruby, a strong, dedicated woman of God and pastor of a small Pentacostal congregation. I didn't quite realize the depth and breadth of her influence until the service.

I came to know Ruby when she was a housekeeper for me earlier six or more years ago (back in the good ol' days when I could afford help). She'd be at our house all day, cleaning and doing laundry, refusing to iron inside in air conditioning and always staying in the garage, even in sweltering heat and humidity. Many times she'd bring people with her - maybe a few children who needed tending, often Aunt P. who helped her iron and made me laugh, once in a while one of her flock (usually a young woman with hopeful eyes).

Ruby wasn't a full-time housekeeper - she just needed some extra income to support her family and flock. Several times a year she'd travel to visit family or preach at a revival in Alabama. She raised four biological children and five stepchildren, adopted two more and took in many others who needed help. Turns out, she was many things to many people, answering to many names: Momma, Grandma, Pastor, Ruby, Miss Ruby (as my children knew her), Mizz Johnson (that's how we pronounce Mrs. in the South).

Having never attended a service in a Pentacostal Church, much less a funeral service at an African-American church, I wasn't sure what to expect at her service. What I found was awesome! The front of the printed program had a photo of Ruby dressed in her finest preaching attire and was titled, "Home Going Celebration for Paster Ruby." Home Going Celebration. That's exactly what it was. The other funerals I've attended have been for white people, held in funeral homes or churches, with remembrances and always, always with tears.

At Ruby's service, it was all smiles and nods and right hands in the air as people swayed to music and shouted, "Yes!" Just like the program stated, it was a celebration. Tears had been shed before and will be shed again, but not yesterday. The music was fabulous and inspiring and made me stand and clap my hands or tap my feet and dance in my seat. It came as no surprise that the prayers were passionate pleas invoking God to give us strength in Ruby's absence and praising Ruby, who is right where she wanted to be, who went "Home" in time to celebrate Christmas with Jesus.

I want a funeral service like Ruby's. No tears, no sadness, just knowledge that I'm in a better place, with lots of funny stories (there are loads of them). With lots of great music that makes people stand and clap and dance in their seats.

Ruby, I'm blessed to have known you. You are missed.

Homemade Gifts that Your Friends Will Like - Really!

I'm still wringing my hands over our holiday gift list and having limited resources this year, throwing money at the problem isn't an option. I'm having to rely on creativity, not cash.

Fortunately, yesterday I had a "Eureka!" moment and came up with a gift idea for friends: Wine Crate Fireplace Kits. (Many thanks to my friend Chris, whose invaluable suggestion made the idea work!) The genesis of the idea was an email I received from Park Wine Merchants, our neighborhood indie wine shop (see my Nov. 23 post about patronizing local merchants). In addition to special deals on several wines, the owner mentioned that he was selling wooden wine crates for $5. I thought, "Hhmmm. Wine crates are pretty cool and look pretty classy. What could I do with them? They're definitely the right price." Ten minutes later I was talking about them with Chris, who suggested filling them with firelogs made of newspaper and then the eureka thing happened and my problem was solved. Throw in some fireplace matches and I'll have attractive and unique Christmas gifts for about $8 each.

The Wine Crate Fireplace Kits will work as a family gift (when we give an entire family one gift), but I must admit that they're geared to adults and no kid is going to be interested in or feel grateful for newspaper fire logs. Other times I've made gifts that the entire family enjoyed. For example, several years ago I gave friends a homemade S'mores Family Pack. They consisted of four long-handled roasting forks, graham crackers, marshmallows and chocolate bars. Each pack also included a little booklet with s'mores history, fun facts and eight or ten different "Gourmet S'mores" recipes (I made the booklets and used paper supplies from Sam Flax to make them look professional-ish). The pyromaniac in me thought these would be good family fun, not to mention being a yummy and nostalgic treat. I don't recall what they cost but the price was very reasonable (the only challenge was finding enough roasting forks). These went over well with adults AND kids.

Over the years I've made other gifts for individuals and families: knitted scarves, created Southern "Good Luck for the New Year" kits (with hot sauce and bags of black-eyed peas, rice and corn meal, plus instructions on how to prepare them) and even framed quotes from famous people (different quotes, each geared specifically to the person who received it). Maybe one day I'll have money to throw at Christmas presents - and when I do, I'm going to have everything gift-wrapped by someone else! Until then, I'll be scanning emails for good deals on wine crates and the like.

Tell us about some of the gifts (successful or not) that you've made for friends and family. After all, I still have names on my list...

Shopping Season isn't Over Yet - More Gift Ideas

Thanksgiving leftovers are gone, we survived Black Friday and Cyber Monday, and now that it's regular ol' Wednesday, time to consider more gift ideas. Remember: One for them, one for you.

As far as I'm concerned, pigs aren't cute. This Pig Cooking Lid is an exception. As the name implies, it can be used to cover pots. The snout is actually two steam holes - a clever nostril application if there ever was one! I'd like it just to have for covering dishes in the microwave that would otherwise splatter (it's safe for both microwave and dishwasher). Check out this multi-functional gift that goes for $18 at MoMAstore.org and support the arts while you cook.


Urawaza: Secret Everyday Tips and Tricks from Japan - This sounds like a fun and helpful little book, from what I've read about it. Various descriptions include the following: "The subject of popular TV shows and numerous books in Japan, these unusually clever solutions to everyday problems have never before been published in English - until now! Urawaza collects more than 100 once-secret tricks, offering step-by-step directions and explanations in an eye-catching package as unconventional as its contents... Here are some examples of the wisdom found in this book: Want to turbocharge your sled? Spray the bottom with nonstick cooking spray. Can't find someone to water your plants while you're away? Place the plant on a water-soaked diaper, so it slowly absorbs water over time." Ingenious! Check your favorite bookstore; amazon.com offers it for $14.95.

Chocolate Calculator - Need a touch of whimsy in your world? Then this is for you. It's a real working calculator shaped like a chocolate bar; even the packaging looks realistic (it's wrapped in foil!). My friend Peggy is a serious chocoholic and fourth grade teacher - how cute would this be in her classroom? It's only $5.95 at Kim and Jason Lemonade Stand.

Gifts that Really Give! This handmade capiz shell ornament is attractive in its own right. When you consider that it benefits artisans who participate in a social services organization in the Phillipines, it becomes even more beautiful. It is just one of hundreds of items sold by Ten Thousand Villages, which since 1946 "... has supported the work of literally tens of thousands of artisans in over 37 countries in Asia, Africa, Latin America and the Middle East, making [it] one the largest fair trade organizations in North America. Working with 130 artisan groups, we purchase fine pieces from craftspeople with whom we have longstanding, nurturing relationships... helping to bring dignity to their lives." Cost of the ornament: $10. Cost of feeling good because you helped needy artisans around the world: Priceless.

Burning Bookmark - For the devoted reader who stays up all night - if it takes her - to read the latest installment of the Twilight book series, here is the ultimate bookmark. Flames seem to virtually jump off the page when you read that fast! A terrific stocking stuffer for the book lover in your family. Just $5.99 at perpetualkid.com

... And speaking of perpetualkid.com, you might also want to pick up another fun stocking stuffer: The microphone sponge. You know you sing in the shower. We know you sing in the shower - we can HEAR you! We're not suggesting that you quit your day job, but if you're going to sing your heart out, then grab this sponge and really go for it! Also $5.99 at perpetualkid.com